< BACK  | AT HOME • August 6, 2014

What Arm Candy Wives are teaching our daughters

“You were put on this planet to create a life that would leave you awe-struck.”

Arm candy wife = I will marry you for money and look pretty on your arm in return (while putting up with all sorts of your nonsense cause I am financially dependent on you).

A deadly transaction indeed. Marrying a man for financial ‘freedom’ comes at a great cost. All too often, I see women marry for money (most have the balls enough to admit it) and in return give up their self-respect. You see, financial dependence on another human being can come with a great power struggle – I pay for food on the table, the designer clothes on your back, the Rolex on your arm therefore you will put up with all my abusive crap. I have seen women endure physical abuse, emotional abuse, infidelity all in the name of – m.o.n.e.y.y.y.y.y.y.y.y.y

I had one such lady come to me and complain her daughter was showing signs of being overly obsessed with her looks at the mere age of 10. Here is a mum who openly brags about how she can bag a man worthy of millions (and is in a relationship where the father of her child has multiple girlfriends and is emotionally abusive) and then wonders why her daughter doesn’t care to study
and primarily focuses on her looks.

Let’s take a deeper look at what this is teaching our kids:

What its teaching our sons:

  • Women are not capable of making money
  • Women are only capable of looking pretty i.e. a woman is nothing more than her looks
  • Women are objects worthy only of physical admiration

What its teaching our daughters:

  • I need to look pretty so I can marry someone rich
  • Pursuing business aspirations interfere with my goals of being ‘pretty’
  • I am better off acting like a bimbo
  • Love? Whats that? I want money.
  • Self -Respect is non existent. I am nothing more than my body and looks.

Somewhere along the way you decided you were nothing more than your body.
Somewhere along the way you decided you were incapable of making money.
Somewhere along the way you decided you would trade your body, your dignity,
your worth to be decked up in designer clothes and brag about your man’s

Somewhere along the way, you decided you weren’t worthy of more.

I am here to tell you otherwise. You were born worthy, whole and complete and simply started to believe the lies you tell yourself. You were put on this planet to create a life that would leave you awe-struck. Love, respect and dignity are not an option, they’re a given.

It’s time to step out of the lies that you tell yourself and up to your own power. If not for you, do it for your kids.

After all, the greatest gift you can give your children is your own empowerment.



Be all that you are

Samar Shera



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